Lust versus love, that is the question! New York Times bestselling author and spiritual success coach DeVon Franklin stopped by the studio on Thursday, February 28, and shared the findings from his latest book, The Truth About Men.
In the book, Franklin reveals candidly and openly why men behave the way they do and what everyone — men and women — need to know about it in order to have a successful marriage or relationship.
“Both of us need this truth,” Franklin told Ryan of the book. “The thesis is as men we don’t know how to love, we know how to lust … we’re taught to be tough and sometimes we think of toughness in the opposite way of love and I think when we love it makes us tough.”
Franklin adds that anything we suppress, we end up empowering.
“Too often as men, we are holding things in, we aren’t honest about what we’re struggling with; we’re not honest about what we think, and, as a result, that lust in us gets fed and we usually turn to lust as a way to release stress because we aren’t communicating.”
The producer continued that when men don’t practice love, they become “what that lust wants us to be.”
“When we don’t practice love, we can never become the men we were created to be and that’s why I wanted to write this book,” he explained. “To show us how to do it, how to navigate the challenges that love presents.”
Franklin made a point to acknowledge that this isn’t a book about what women need to do better.
“Women, to me, are already doing their work,” he explained. “Men have to become accountable and responsible for [their] behavior.”
Listen back to the full interview above for more, including why you shouldn’t ask single friends for relationship advice, what DeVon’s own wife thinks about the book and more!